Two games, no points
Now that the new look West Ham have played two matches and lost them both against opposition that we might realistically have garnered a point or two from, it is time to take stock. After bright starts in both games we faded, especially against Bolton, who maintained their extraordinary run of success against West Ham, with seven victories on the trot.
Obviously it didn’t help to miss a penalty in the first half (why was Carlton Cole taking it anyway?) and the witches curse is clearly still on us regarding finding the net, as it was last season. Potentially our best player, Hitz the Hammer, predictably got injured during a pre-season friendly and that just summed it up for many of us watching from the stands. Our next two matches? Chelsea and Manchester United. Cheers! That will take us into mid-September without a point. Fantastic. Bottom of the league and the season has hardly begun.
Stop smiling, you're injured. 
How did we survive last season? Because there were three teams in the Premier League even worse than us, that’s how. And, to be honest, it looks the same way this season. I would even say that there are four teams who look like they may as well save time and book their hotel rooms in various northern mining towns for next season now. “Who are they?” I hear you ask. Well, Wigan obviously, with ten goals conceded in two games already, four of which coming from Blackpool, who are coincidentally my second candidate. I also feel that either Sunderland or Wolves could be in for the chop this term. There we have it, I’ve placed my bets. West Ham will end somewhere between 13th and 17th this season because they just cannot finish any lower.
The early high scoring results are certainly helping to fuel the suspicion that the Premier League is starting to resemble the Spanish League more and more each season; The best teams are winning bigger and better and the weaker teams are, well, weaker. This has led to West Ham finding themselves in a sub-league with all the weaker teams, and within this sub-league they are probably one of the better sides.
One last word - Spurs have started the season looking just as dodgy as their manager. I have a funny feeling that they will wander around the mid-table most of this season, just as they used to some 10-15 years ago. Our ‘Arry has had a good run recently but he is due his inevitable return to mid-table mediocrity, and Spurs’ defense in the first two matches has looked every bit as bad as West Ham’s.
Submitted by Lionel Stanbrook
25/8/2010
